Things That Glow
by Vivid Butterfly
Summary: Leia spends her early years living with her Aunt on Naboo, carrying the weight of the worlds on her tiny shoulders.


Yeah, so, this one, will amazingly enough, not be a one-shot.

* * *

Things that Glow

She was nearly five when he first saw her, four and five eighths to quote her exactly.

She had been lying on the ground in the middle of the pavement, arms outstretched like she was attempting to make a snow angel, despite the apparent lack of crystallized water.

Darth Vader had thought something was wrong with her, so he had extended the force, felt it pulsing in the air around him, and what he saw almost surprised him. The girl child had as much potential as many of the grown Jedi Knights and Masters he had killed.

"Is there something wrong?" He was watching her through a tangle of his stray blonde bangs.

She opened her eyes that seemed far too large for her petite face and looked at him like there was something very wrong with him.

"Why would there be?" Speaking with an elegance that seemed far too mature for a girl such her size should have been the first clue there was something different about her.

"You're in my way." He wasn't sure how he had meant that statement to be taken, and he really didn't care. It had been the truth; her tiny frame was in the middle of his path.

"Hmmm," she leaned her head back further so that he chin was titled up to the sky and she could see him better.

"Well, I think you can walk around me."

He blinked his blue eyes slowly, unsure whether to be annoyed or amused. She had spoken in that stated there would be no argument for her word was law.

"_Well_," he began, voice slightly scathing and mocking, "What if I don't want to?"

She looked contemplative for a few long moments, searching for just the right words.

"That's too bad."

"If I may ask, what are you doing?" Curiosity always got the best of him, and he known he would probably regret asking the question before it had managed to slip off of his tongue.

"Holding up the ground." He didn't bother to ask, just took a long stride over her and continued on his way.

* * *

Somehow it seemed that Darth Vader's fame as the ruler of the Galactic Empire and eluded this small girl, so he shouldn't have been surprised the next time she approached him standing barefoot in a sundress eating ice-cream. Her long brown hair fell in soft waves down her back, much as his own would have if he had bothered to let it grow longer than his shoulders.

She shouldn't have made him uncomfortable, he was the fucking Emperor, he was used to people staring at him, but I it, for some odd reason it did. He'd wait for her to speak first if she really wanted to talk to him, she would.

She was a bubbly little child wasn't she? She couldn't keep quiet for too long.

"What're you doing?"

"Work." He wasn't lying, his paper lay strewn in front of him, a glass of water sat next to his left hand. Well, he wasn't really doing work; he just thought he should be.

"Is it boring?"

"Yes."

"Oh, okay." Without asking, she took a seat across from him, her little feet not reaching the ground, swinging back and forth happily.

"What's your name, I'm Leia."

"Anakin," the name easily slipped off of his tongue, it wasn't like he wasn't Anakin, any more; he was just Vader as well. The new name cast a shadow over the former, but it did not overcast it completely.

"I'm going to call you, Nika, 'cause that seems like part o'your name backside-ways." She must have meant backwards.

Once again, Vader had no idea whether to be disgusted or mildly amused.

* * *

She was back to the pavement the next time he saw her. She opened her big brown doe-like eyes when a shadow covered her face.

"Heya Nika!" She seemed so pleased with her name for him that Anakin didn't bother to remind her that wasn't his real name.

"Hello, Atlas." Leia understood right away. It was a common myth among most planetary systems. The one of the god forced to hold up the sky.

"Do you want to help me?"

"Help you do what?

"Hold down the pavement."

* * *

"Hey Nika."

"Why do you call me that?"

"It's my secret name for you, so I can use it and no one else, and you'll always know it's me."

"I don't think I need you to give me a name for me to remember you by, Atlas."

* * *

"Hi, Ani," Vader glanced up from where he had been sitting at a table outside of a restaurant eating, yes even dark lord of the Sith had to eat on occasion. He tucked an unruly wave of hair behind his ear. He couldn't quite remember when she had started to call him Ani instead of her 'secret name,' but he didn't really mind.

"Hello, Atlas." She grinned, proudly showing off two missing teeth and took a seat next to him. He was by now quite used to her disregard for his personal space.

"Shouldn't you be at work?" Vader visibly stiffened at the little girl's comment. That hit a little too close to home, he should have left Naboo over two weeks ago, but he didn't have the heart to leave the beautiful planet that held so many memories of his more innocent days.

"Shouldn't you be at school?"

Leia smiled.

"It's a holiday."

Vader made an agreeing sort of 'hmm' noise and continued to stare at his plate of almost-gone food.

"Where do you work, Ani?"

"The galactic empire."

"Really? Are you a politician?"

"I hate politicians."

"Hey, my mommy was a politician!"

"Well, I probably hated her." Vader was grinning when the waiter came, nervous and fidgeting for her recognized the face of the man who ruled the galaxy.

"S-sir, c-could I get you any dessert?"

The words were forming on Vader's lips when he was rudely interrupted by Leia.

"Can I get some ice-cream, please?"

She wasn't talking to Vader; she was politely asking the waiter, like any good little girl would do.

The waiter looked over at Vader expectantly, and he merely gave the terrified man a wave of his hand, and the waiter scuttled off to go fulfill the order.

Leia had already finished half of her desert when she decided it was a good time to talk, Ani hadn't said anything, and Leia hated uncomfortable silences.

"Did you know my mommy?"

Vader glanced down to look into her brown eyes, waiting for her to continue. She didn't.

"Does, this elusive mother of yours have a name?" He made sure to put the emphasis on 'name', raising an eyebrow that was a tad darker than the rest of his hair.

Leia smiled and opened her mouth to speak, but her attention was quickly diverted by a middle-aged woman, calling out her name.

"Leia Shmi Naberrie, get over here right now." Leia took two huge spoonfuls of ice-cream and crammed them into her mouth and jumped out of her seat running quickly over to the awaiting woman, hair flowing behind her like a wave of brown.

What a scheming little child, Vader was forced to foot the bill.

* * *

"Heya Nika," she had reverted back to her secret name.

"Hello, Atlas." It was burning in the back of his throat, slipping up into the back off his skull and corroding his brain. He had to ask. He needed to know.

"Was your mother's name Padmè?" He wasn't sure what answer he wanted. What if this truly was Padmè's child? Where did that leave him? As a father? It couldn't be, she had been pregnant, she had come to retrieve him from Mustafar, but he had fought with his former master and killed him. Then when the Palpatine had come to retrieve him, he had quickly disposed of him and took his rightful place as Emperor.

When he had gotten back, she had been gone, he had later heard she had died, seen the pictures of her funeral on the holonews. Was it possible their child had survived?

"How did you know that?" She was grinning, sitting on the chair across from him; legs swinging back and forth, still unable to touch the ground, Anakin had begun to frequent the restaurant, unsure as of why.

His tongue felt thick and motionless in his mouth.

"You must of known her, were you friends? Was she really pretty? Was she brave and smart? Did she love what she did? Did she always look out for people who needed to be looked out for? Do I look like her? Did you argue a lot in the Senate?" The questions came out in a rush of words in a way that only a four (nearly five) year-old girl could ever accomplish. His mind was barely processing the information, only able to catch a few of the questions.

"We... argued a lot..." He should have been able to sense that this little girl had been his child, their child; she looked so much like her mother.

Leia's face fell, her eyes got sort of shiny in the afternoon sun like she was about to cry.

"Did you hate her?"

What was he supposed to say? That he was this little girl's father? That he had loved her mother more than anything? That he would give up everything to have her back?

How come it sounded so logical in his brain?

"Sometimes." He breathed. His eyes were clouded slightly, and he had to distract himself. He could have sworn his voice almost cracked while he spoke. He needed to keep his emotions in check.

"Oh." She sounded so disappointed. He almost wished he could change what he said, but Vader was not a liar.

He hated Padmè right now. Hated her for coming to save him from the Dark side which she would never be able to fully comprehend. Hated her for making him think she had loved Obi-wan. Hated her for making him hurt her. Hated her for being too strong, hated her for being too weak.

He mostly hated her, because hating was so much easier than grieving.

* * *

She rarely came out at night, so when he had seen her standing outside, staring up at the sky, barefoot and in a nightdress completely enthralled by the shooting stars and space ships that were passing above her, he had been almost shocked.

"Leia, what are you doing out so late?"

"Watching existence." How could something so cryptic come from such a small girl.

"I'm taking you home; a girl your age shouldn't be out so late."

"I'm nearly five."

"I know." He bent down to one knee and scooped her up in both of his arms. She was such a light little thing, he realized absently. Though Naboo was a pleasantly warm planet, not scorching hot like Tatooine or freezing like Hoth, it was a considerably cold night, and Leia's small body was shivering slightly.

Using the force to draw up a corner of his thick black cloak and placed it over the girl cradled in his arms.

The place hadn't changed at all in the eight or so years since he had visited. With a wave of his hand, the door opened silently, and he entered, dropping the little girl on the couch, she shivered slightly, she had already fallen asleep and the rhythmic deep breaths made her chest rise and fall slowly.

A thumb had managed to find its way into her mouth. Without hesitation, he pulled off his cloak and draped it over the girl, leaving her to whatever dreams she was having.

* * *

She looked tired when she visited Vader the next day, clinging to the cloak in her arms like many children would cling to teddy bears.

She didn't take her customary seat across from him and ask him how his day was. She didn't ask about her mother, she didn't order herself food and stick it on his bill and flounce off once she had finished.

She didn't do any of that; she just stood there looking at him through slightly glazed and reddened eyes, like she had been crying.

"Nika," she mumbled. That was not a good sign; now Leia only seemed to use her secret backside-ways name when she was nervous.

"Yes, Atlas?" The tears by now had formed and were sliding down her face, and for some odd reason he wanted to get up kneel by her and wipe away those tears.

"Auntie Sola says I can't visit you anymore."

"Why?" It had already slid off of his tongue and past his lips before he realized it had, and he wished he could grab the words out of the air and stuff them back into his mouth.

She sniffed again.

"She said you were a bad man, she said you did bad things, is that true Nika? It's not true is it?" Her brown eyes were shining in the early morning light.

"Come." It wasn't a suggestion, it was a command, but it wasn't laced with force influence or barked in a harsh voice, like he would usually do if he wanted someone to obey him. Leia nodded and walked over to him. With ease and grace; he picked her up and sat her on his lap.

And now, with the crying girl in his arms, shivering in the cool air so accustomed to visiting before the sun really began its journey across Naboo's sky, he realized for the first time just how young she was. She was so small and fragile, so delicate and perfect, so strong and resilient, just like her mother.

There was no need for words, or at least the words that really needed to be said were not forming properly in his mind.

"Don't worry, Leia." He managed to say, voice even. "Everything is going to work out in the end."

Vader had made many empty promises before. Promises he intended to fulfill but was never able to. He seriously hoped this promise was not another one of those.

* * *

"Doesn't it ever get heavy?" Vader was watching the little girl through the bangs of his hair.

"What?" She sniffed, trying to wipe away the tears that were trying to slide down her face.

"Having to hold down the earth."

Leia nodded somberly, sniffing again and closed her eyes. Little voice cracking she spoke.

"Yes, sometimes. But somebody's got to do it."

At that very moment, Darth Vader did a very un-Sith like thing and lay down next to the girl, the daughter of his beloved wife, the product of their love, his child, his baby girl. The youngling filled with an unimaginable force-potential who he would soon take with him back to Coruscant to train. She would become his successor. She would one day rule the galaxy.

And at that moment he did a very un-Sith like and unprofessional thing. He helped her hold down the pavement.

He helped her hold up the earth, because everyone gets tired sometimes, and little girls shouldn't have all the weight of the world on their shoulders.


End file.
